Practice, Practice, Practice

Many adults have never talked about bodies, boundaries, or body parts or functions, and may not know how. For some of us, there may have been no talk of bodies, or only one at home or at school in health class. Talking to kids about this can seem scary. Conversation about tough topics is a skill we can practice. The more we do it, the easier it becomes - and it doesn’t have to start with the serious topics.

Some ways to build these skills include:
    Spend time listening to what the child has to say (“Tell me more about that.”)
    Repeat back what you’ve heard (“I think I heard you say….”)
    Ask questions (“What did you think about ….” “How did that make you feel?”)
    See things through your child’s eyes ("That must have felt...!")
    Acknowledge the child’s feelings (“It sounds like you feel….”)
    Allow children to name negative feelings, even if they make you uncomfortable
    Avoid making comments or judgments about your child’s character
    Admit mistakes (“I’m sorry, I was wrong,” )
    Use humor—but not at the expense of the child
    Speak simply, and know you can come back to a topic over and over. 

The kids in your life might ask questions you don't know the answers to - and that's okay! Take time to honor your child's curiosity and find the answer together. This might sound like, "It's totally normal to be curious about this. I am not sure the answer to your question. Let's learn more together!" 

Some great tools that can support you include websites like Amaze, Common Sense Media (particularly if the question is about something they saw in the media), and Safe Secure Kids. You can also learn more about books that might help in these conversations on the Read page.​